146. Vienna, 7 to 12 April 2013

Austria is famous for being the birthplace of Hitler, but it is not all bad and, indeed, this means nothing to me in the context of this description of a few pubs o'Vienna. The EGU conference happens in about April every year and is an opportunity to have a few beers. The priority for booze began as I stepped off the plane, and because collecting some beer, fake Aperol and poor quality gin at a supermarket at the airport made me miss my train, I decided to have a scoop whilst waiting for the next. There is a rather grubby and smoky little bar at the airport called Johann's Biereck, and I sat at a high stool in a fug of fag fumes having a dunkel beer and a burger. Thankfully it was time to leave and I got the train, settled into the hotel, and had a beer and/or gin and/or Aperol from my stash.

The following day and without any evening appointments, I felt that use of my train ticket was in order to scope out a venue for an evening meeting taking place the next day and also to try out the 1516 Brewing Company which had been recommended to me. This was a breath of fresh air, and consisted of quite a noisy and busy pub, done in an English style, a little like one of those erstwhile Firkins. It was on two levels and had a very good array of beer which I didn't write down, but I did make sure that I had something dark to wash down the schnitzel or similar local dish which I had selected. I sat upstairs where there were proper tables, but it could have been more sensible to have stayed downstairs had I been with others and fancied a session on the beer.

Some serious business beckoned on the Tuesday and the venue selected for the Marine Geology informal meeting was the Pürstner. This was a very authentic place with an emphasis on food, but the beer range was adequate and well-kept although I did not record what I had (though it was dark again). As I recall those who had ordered Tafelspitz required an inordinate amount of room as the constituent parts of this dish arrive separately and are all dished up onto one plate. Not one to have if you have loads of loose papers etc. to juggle. We eventually finished off and four of us fancied a nightcap, so after quite some walking we decided that we might as well go into the über-trendy Cserni Bar, which I think was situated at the bottom of some hotel. Four geologists in Goretex did not fit in that well with a load of Teutonic yuppies getting in the way, but we made the best of drinking overpriced bland lager charged to an expense account, served up in clinical glasses whilst we sat on minimalist-looking high bar stools trying to hear each other.

The UNO restaurant at the Arcotel across the road from the conference venue is a soft option for editors' luncheon meetings and I had had a couple of these already, albeit dry. An opportunity to have an afternoon meeting manifested itself however and seeing that the other attendees were keen to have a beer, I had one too, again something dark. We had a nice comfortable booth which made the very bright decor tolerable.

Thursday 11th April had been scheduled as a big night out. We had arranged a reviewer reception at dusk and after this had finished, the group of Elsevier employees - who should probably remain nameless - decided to reward ourselves with a few ales and a dinner out on the town. First stop, for dinner, was the Artner Franziskanerplatz, where there were also some interesting drinks drunk and where I suppose you could stay just for a drink, although I personally would not have wanted to. Jagermeister was involved at some stage I believe, as were a couple of beers and perhaps other unconventional shots. The building itself is rather interesting being in a cellar or similar. It is not as bad as it sounds.

Eventually it was time to leave and we managed to find something a little more down at heel, the Bellini, where entertainments were taking place. We stayed here for a good few rounds of both beer and spritz, and sat in quite a nice area near the toilets where we would see the middle aged husky voiced lady barking out various disco classics in Germanic tones. Some middle aged locals with curly moustaches and feathers in their caps seemed to be enjoying the show - we were bemused more than anything. A much more real place to go drinking though, for real people, and with a toilet of exceptional note. Those of you who watched Delia Smith's Cookery Course from c. 1979 to 1981 may recall that at the time there was somewhat of a vogue for dark brown smoked glass ramekin dishes. That memory is evoked with the wall mounted urinal in the gents' at Bellini.
Brown smoked glass wall mounted urinal in the gents' at Bellini, Vienna
For some reason, perhaps to appease the younger members of the group, we went to a more club-like venue, the Floridita, which I did not have any great affection for. It was rather empty, down some stairs and made crap cocktails and served crapper beer. It closed more prematurely than expected, which was perhaps a good thing, although I still believe that we stayed for an hour and probably shoehorned another 2 or 3 beers in whilst there. It was now about 4am and I retired back to the hotel for some very poor quality sleep, before waking up the next day, feeling substandard, and delivering a presentation that I didn't understand to a small group of uninterested listeners. The conference had finally finished and to reward myself for making it through this most taxing of days, I stopped for dinner (sausage) at the airport and of course had to have a customary beer (lager) at the rather sanitised Kulinariat at G gates, before getting on the plane and having a well-earned doze.


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Dan Lovegrove
dan@doctor-lovegrove.com

Last updated 18th September 2013.