61.
Mundane Pubs in Sutton and Cheam, Friday 9th and Saturday 10th April 2004
Richard Bradshaw and I had discussed some
sort of plan in which we were going to have a gentle Good Friday filling in
some gaps in our pub lists in the Sutton area. By and large the beer was dire,
and during the time between when we had arranged the crawl and when it was
actuated, I had taken a turn for feeling distinctly shite. Nonetheless, I
decided to go for it. Richard had greased the cogs from lunchtime, with a swift
six or so at the Cazbar (Worcester Park), The Worcester Park and the Falcon
(Clapham). I started at the Thatched House Hotel between Sutton and Cheam which
neither of us had been to before and were not expecting any beer. We didn't get
any either, in fact they only had two taps - keg lager, keg bitter. Even so, it
was a reasonably pleasant hotel bar with a nice TV in the corner, although as
we were to find the next day, they don't really serve non-residents. A plaque
behind the bar sung the praises of the Todgers Golfing Society, and on another
plaque, a certain Gary Willmot was recorded as a trophy winner [wonder if it's
the same bloke as that idiot from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang?]
Dragging ourselves away, we proceeded to
the Holiday Inn at Sutton near the Secombe Centre which I had only previously
been to before a Midge Ure concert about 5 years ago, when it was called the
Big Blue. I think it has been remodelled in the interim, though remains a very
modern hotel bar. We were obliged to drink fizzy Carling. The toilets are very
nice though. Next stop was the awful Grapes at the bottom of Sutton, a very
loud place which is probably some sort of 'nite spot'. No beer again, although
the lager range was quite good. I was particularly not in the mood for staying
as it was packed.
There was no beer at the Woodman, in the
Newtown area East of Sutton. However, it was a reasonably quiet pub and quite
welcoming, though a little tatty and having very few seats, mostly empty spaces
for some reason. Last Night a DJ saved my life was on the jukebox, so
the atmosphere mark is quite good. Yet another beerless pub was experienced at
the Victory a few yards up the road. I was feeling quite dire, so the crowded,
lively atmosphere afforded in Sutton's smallest pub was most unpleasant.
However, it is rather a good cosy pub if you're in the mood, and has a lot of
character with a very cramped toilet and a magnificent array of snacks behind
the tiny bar.
Finally some real beer! The [Lord] Nelson,
20 yards away from the Victory, does two standard varieties of Young’s. The pub
is reasonable, standard Young’s interior. Average in just about every way, but
given this desert of decent pubs, was actually worth quite a good atmosphere
mark and it's true, was quite welcoming inside. I was feeling truly awful at
one point, but then came through it in enough form to finish my pint and go
home on a 151 bus.
The following day, I felt well enough to
perform a crawl and Richard and I had arranged a Raynes Park excursion.
Unfortunately, Richard had spent all day getting himself wankered on lager with
Andy Pidgely in Dorking, and as a result we instead went for the soft option of
a couple of jars in Cheam. Kicking off at the Railway, deathly quiet for 8pm on
a Saturday and no George Best in sight, Richard manfully ploughed through his
beer whilst I had some Courage Best (needless to say the only choice). By the time
we had moved to the Harrow, he had deteriorated and half way through our
'Lagers of the World' selections (and quite good they were too, eg; Coors,
Cobra, Juliper) decided to call it a night. However, on the walk back to his flat,
he momentarily regained the taste for ale so we stopped for a quick pint at the
Thatched House. A bad move, as five minutes later, Rich had had a relapse, and
it was time to go home, this time for good. Mind you, for his trouble, he'd got
a Coors glass from the Harrow, so the expedition was not completely in vain...
Dan
Lovegrove
dan@doctor-lovegrove.com
Last updated 24th April 2004.