53. Botley Road Pub Crawl, Saturday 29th November 2003

Dave Wacey and I had identified a core business need to exploit potential growth markets in West Oxford niche territories; ie go for a pub crawl on Botley Road. It was dicking it down with rain in the morning so we got a bus to the station which took an absolute age through the milling hoards of Christmas shoppers but we did eventually get out at the station and it wasn't very long before we got to the Holly Bush on Osney Island, the first stop of the day. A bloke with particularly shaky hands was pulling pints (and carrying food to the tables). Three beers - IPA, Ruddles and Abbot - were available, though the IPA wasn't that nice, and was a bit pricey. The interior was OK and even though there are not that many seats, there are a couple of fantastic old bastards chairs. Lack of tables meant that we had to enter into conversation with a stoned individual. However, we knew that we were not going to see him later because this was apparently the only pub in Oxford where he could drink. Gents toilets are accessible directly from the entrance hall to the street.

Walking via Osney Mead, an area where there are probably several dead bodies hidden in ditches, sensibly during daylight hours, we arrived at the Fishes in North Hinksey. This is a pub which has several nice corners, and if there was a taxi to pick you up, could host you for an entire evening. Though you might get bored of the beer as it's only IPA. Watch out for the barman that looks like Rod Stewart. It's also a bit foody but for some reason this does not detract from the quality. Moving back to the main road and the Seacourt Arms, we found Botley's only locals pub, and it looks a bit like a London boozer. Marstons Pedigree and Banks Bitter were the offerings which made a pleasing change, and they tasted good and were fair value. Not alot else to say really, well maybe that there is quite cheap food too. Not really worth making a pilgrimage to though. Back over the ring road is the George, a strange pub with a conservatory and some very plush seats. I can't see any reason to come here. Indeed the only reason would be to watch the occasional live bands. However it was a fair enough place to while away some time watching the latter stages of the football scores, and consume a reasonable half of Greene King IPA.

Having nipped via Curry’s for some blank CDs, I decided that the time had come for some more liquid reward, so we swung into the Osney Arms for a half. This is quite a strange pub, the front resembling a doss house, with linoleum floors and spartan furnishings, whilst the back bar accessible via a small passageway is actually quite nice and cosy. A couple boring each other shitless with physics knowledge were occupying one of the best seats in the house in the plush surroundings. The whole place has a bygone feel, from the jukebox to the fixtures and fittings and perhaps the sell by dates of the bar snacks. The beer, only Green King IPA, was also past its prime and was sold by a miserable old bloke. Nonetheless, it would be a pleasant place to go for a midweek drink if you lived nearby. A notable feature is the excellent gent's complete with mosaic tiling and four-man, yes, four-man sculpted Victorian trough with individual pissing berths. It also has a hatch which used to do off-license sales. Enough of that and time to go back onto Osney Island and this time to the Waterman's Arms. This place was deathly quiet, and we speculated that it had only just opened, but empty pint pots told us otherwise. To break the drinking monotony, we shied away from IPA and instead went for a very pleasant couple of halves of Morland Original. The pub is quite quaint and very traditional. There is a very small pool table which we had a game on and there are even some sawn off cues for awkward shots. I can't really think of anything else distinctive about this pub, but it is worth a visit.

Near the station is the White House, which on our last visit was so shit that even the Guinness was off. This time it was much better, and there were in total four beers on - London Pride, Abbot, 6X, Hook Norton Best - and the Pride tasted very good. It's a bit pricey in there but worth it. Interior-wise, it's quite foody and has got a strange air of 80s yuppie bar to it, but if you can get them, there are a couple of nice low chairs where people are supposed to sit while waiting for a table. The main bar bit done with black cane chairs. Noteworthy also was that there was some sort of jar of pickled/in oil bar snacks (artichoke perhaps) though I'm not sure how often this gets ordered or how they deal with it. Oh yes, and the gents have the decoration of a mid-80s teenage boy's bedroom. Reluctantly we left, and hit upon another moderately decent boozer, the Kite, although by this time we were back in IPA and Abbot territory. This again tasted very good (perhaps because we chose Abbot) as we sat at the bar drinking it, and was well priced to boot. Another traditional pub with a very large selection of dry bar snacks including sweets in a machine on the wall. They keep their beer well, as I recall last time there was an excellent half of Morrells. I've also been informed that the odd after hours session happens.

Crap pubs beckoned now on Park End Street, Thirst being our first port of call. This is a very minimalist cocktail bar which is OK if you are in the mood for drinking cocktails. Sadly the place was empty and we paid well above what we expected for a couple of bottles of Staropramen, and it goes without saying that there is no real beer. The toilet is very disappointing for a place of this stature. Over the road is the even worse Chicago Rock Cafe which for some reason charged some bloke £3.95 for a pint of Guinness. Our halves of Tetley were £1.60 each (£2.95 a pint). There is really no reason to go in here, as there is no beer either and its only other saving grace was a reasonable selection on the video juke box. As we left before it all kicked off, it was starting to fill with Ben Sherman shirted lager drinkers who would no doubt be pulling rough slappers (some of them arriving too) and spoiling for a fight later on. Or both.

Fortunately we soon found ourselves back in the relatively pleasant surroundings of Rosie O'Grady's. For a start the pub was actually quite welcoming. There was no beer, so it was Caffrey’s instead. One of the bars has a selection of very nice old man's chairs, so we made ourselves at home here, and whilst doing so entered a conversation with a foreign couple extolling the virtues of this website and advising them not to visit Chicagos. Next up, we had recently learned that St Peters college bar had migrated from key payments back to the old favourite of cash. Armed with this knowledge we waltzed in like we owned the place, and pretended to be meeting Chris Frank. As expected, the beer was cheap [not over cheap though, about £1.80], but pleasingly it wasn't bog standard piss, but a good pint of London Pride. It was quiet in there, but still an acceptable place for drinking.

Finally we trudged to the last pub, Bar Oz, which was not nearly as bad as we had expected, nay even moderately pleasant when a group of ladies walked in. Scattered bits of Australiania litter this otherwise very average pub, and we were so surprised that they had Bombardier on that we had in fact already ordered some pissflow Tetleys, and we might even consider going back on a quiet day. (Mind you Bombardier is more often than not vile.) Anyway a successful day and far more achieved than expected. All that was required was to get some fish and chips and fall asleep in front of the TV, which was also duly achieved with minimum fuss.


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Dan Lovegrove
dan@doctor-lovegrove.com

Last updated 1st December 2003.